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{   August 20, 2003   }
Freddy Vs. Jason
Well, I got to see the much anticipated (ok, not really that much…more on a “you’ve got to be kidding” kind of level than anything) Freddy Vs. Jason last night. In one fell swoop we get to see two resurrected (sorry) franchises again, but this time, pitted against each other! Hollywood once again earns it’s collective marketing degree. What results is a treat for everyone. The movie slashes (sorry again) together the best of the horror clichés their title characters’ flicks helped create, including requisite T & A shots and a seemingly endless supply of lives for the killers.

Once the action started to rise for the title bout, one of the audience members politely provided a commentary for the rest of us. With such priceless gems as “Just walk it off, Jason”, “Awww, you pissed him off now…”, and “Get the fuck in the boat, bitch!”, our new friend helped us really get inside the heads of these complex characters. Not that it would’ve been hard to follow the movie’s storyline anyway since it made a point to have one of the characters reiterate the plot every few minutes. Though I usually can’t stand people talking during movies (especially yelling), this was actually welcomed. The movie escalates into what amounts to little more than a wrestling match anyway, so why the hell shouldn’t the crowd be cheering for their contender?

Thankfully, the movie delivers on what we really came to see anyway, the body count. Which is welcomed since you end up hating the characters and their After School Special dialogue so much, you can’t wait for one of the baddies to quickly bring about their demise. Even the odd homage to Jay (from every Kevin Smith movie to date), here named Freeburg, gets old quick.

Character development (haha) aside, it’s good to see two old favorites again. Since franchise timelines (wasn’t Jason in the future…on a space ship last time?) and barriers are already out the window, let’s throw somebody new into the mix next time. Finish it off : Freddy Vs. Jason Vs… ?